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~ AISLE EVIL ~

QUICK ! [CLICK] TO SEE & HEAR THIS WEB PAGE
IN ITS UNPERPLEXED HEXED TEXT FILM VERSION

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Below is my second effort with .Crazy Talk 3.5 .
showing my first use of <<.animated. eyes>>
(if not "Aye"s...<just yet> or <yet just>) and
the benefits of selecting a character so agéd
that his toothlessness is not disturbing.

<AYE !>

LISTEN Arrow Pointing Right to a Streaming Audio mp3 Voiceover Reading of Website Text Content
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The .tune.less .tone.s are
strained strangulations

of my untutored, undoctored,
"Talk Like a Pirate",
do-it-all-in-one-taped-take-and-a-single-breath,
yokel-.vocal.s.

<AYE !>

LISTEN Arrow Pointing Right to a Streaming Audio mp3 Voiceover Reading of Website Text Content
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It's appalling
caterwauling
....................mauling yer fave
incidental .instrumental..

<AYE !>

LISTEN Arrow Pointing Right to a Streaming Audio mp3 Voiceover Reading of Website Text Content
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A mauled cat wailing'd sound better.
........................................................ Better get a kit...

(I recommend [THIS] one)

.....so !

<Be warned !>

LISTEN Arrow Pointing Right to a Streaming Audio mp3 Voiceover Reading of Website Text Content
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Cover yer ears (and yer rears),
<dispute with [.MUTE.]>
and muchly muchly .sweetererly.
.la-la lally. along yerselves...:

~ Aisle Evil - ((Pep-)Talk Like a Pirate) ~

~ Monday 12 January 2004 ~

AISLE EVIL
My
.Lyrics. Set to "Eye Level"

.Original Melody . by Jack Trombey
( ~ he's not a Zombie ~
and he's not in "The Zombies"
)
Popularised by The Simon Park Orchestra
Used as the .theme tune. to seventies
.detective serial.: "Van der Valk".
This version by a .brass band..

Well now for years both your ears
Have been teeming with tears

Their briney brimmings are telling tales

Taking their toll on the shape of your soul

Your rôle's to seek not salvage grails

You won't find any kind of solace in a mind
That is blind to beatitude

Don't build Malice a palace

Just because you're too proud to place platitude

Languishing ! Anguishing !
Malingering is King
And Agony's Emperor

Walled-up with wailing
You wallow in sorrow
You're a simpering whimperer
!

Make a truce with the truth
Unhinge the yoke of youth
It is time to face your disgrace

Once you own you're alone

You can begin to atone
For what made you MOAN

Don't waste MORE time feeling sorry
Instead just pray that your quarry
Swiftly succumbs and becomes chums

with cheerfulness

A sweetening sacrifice

All advice has its price
So open up your heart (and purse)

Pause to reflect and genuflect
No longer nurse
Crass cause to CURSE !

~ UNPERPLEXED HEXED TEXT ~

Just THIS Page as a "Film" --->

The WHOLE "Aisle Evil" SERIES

~ and the last shall be first ~

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CONTENTS
Quick Contents

Quick Contents - Button Linking the Low Graphics Streamlined Version of my Contents Page

SITE INDEX
SITE SEARCH
SITE NAVIGATION

MIXED DATES :
Fast Films

Fast Films - Original Films, Poems, Songs, Greetings, Animations and Jokes Organised into Playlists for Easy Viewing

CONSOLIDATED CLIPS
PADDINGLESS PLAYLISTS

Random
Remarks


Random Remarks - Bloggifications - Commentary - Observations

BLOGGIFICATIONS
COMMENTARY
OBSERVATIONS

Status, Stasis &
Statistical Spoddery


Status, Stasis & Statistical Spoddery - Click for Dynamic Tweets, Book and Music Charts

BOOK & MUSIC CHARTS
TOP TOME TOPICS
TWITTER WITTERINGS
WORDS WORDS WORDS

Lookie-Likies

Lookie-Likies - Click for Lookalikes

DOPPELGÄNGERS
FAMOUS FACES
F(R)AME-LESS FACES
LOOKALIKES
MORPHS
PEOPLE
PORTRAITS
POSERS & POSEURS

Half-cut Offcuts & Software Screencasts

Half-cut Offcuts & Software Screencasts - Click for Tasters of and Diversions from Various Creativity Software Packages

EXPERIMENTS
LEARNING
SCREENCASTS
SILLY OLD THINGS
SOFTWARE DEMOS
WORKS IN PROGRESS

Original Unoriginals
Original Unoriginals - Click for My Re-Readings and Re-Presentations of Famous and Lesser Known Poems and Stories Written by OTHER People (Whatever THEY are)
ORIGINAL READINGS
UNORIGINAL POEMS
UNORIGINAL STORIES
24 SEP 2009 :
Reactionary
Rant and
Screencasts
about
PhotoDraw


Microsoft PhotoDraw 2000 V2 Triple CD Case Image - There's an Elegant Elephant

PROTEST POST
IMAGE EDITING
SCREENCASTS

14 AUG 2009 :
Kit Cat Kid's
Cause "fur"
(Non-Compliant) Complaint


Thumbnail Portrait Paw Trait of Kit Cat Kid - Splashable Star of Original Rhyming Children's Poem Kit Cat Kid's Cause "fur" (Non-Compliant) Complaint - a comic verse about bath-time defiance

CHILDREN'S POEM
ANIMAL ANIMATION
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
ORIGINAL POEM
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING

05 JUN 2009 :
William Blake's
"Lamb-like
Wail"


Thumbnail of a Gripped Eyeball - A still from my multimedia version of William Blake's The Tyger - William Blake's Lamb-like Wail. Part 3 of a series of Poetic Post Cards

POETIC POST CARD
ANIMAL ANIMATION
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
CUTOUT ANIMATION
FACIAL ANIMATION
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING
1 OF MY FAVOURITES

30 NOV 2008 :
Emma Lazarus's
"The New
Colossus"


Thumbnail Still of the Statue of Liberty's Golden Mask - Click and you will witness it speaking the words of Emma Lazarus's poem "The New Colossus" in its native French Accent. Part 2 of a Series of Poetic Post Cards

POETIC POST CARD
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING

10 AUG 2008 :
W.H. Auden's
"O where are
you going ?"


Thumbnail still from the Poetic Post Card - O where are you going - an animated greeting version of Wystan Hugh Auden's poem read aloud in a Welsh accent with further discussion of influence and origin

POETIC POST CARD
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING

04 MAY 2008:
The Tropic of Capricorn (Chips)

Thumbnail still of some sailing boats with Doritos for sails. They were made for a competition using Reallusion's iclone animation software - and illustrate part of a comic rhyming song I wrote to fit some prescribed music

COMPETITION ENTRY
AUDIO-EDITING
BRIEF FOR A BRIEF
ICLONE ANIMATION
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SONG & DANCE
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING

07 FEB 2008 :
The
Confessions
and
Expressions
of St.Augustine


Thumbnail of a still from a comic animated greeting I made which takes part of St. Augustine's Confessions and has them sung by medieval characters painted by Benozzo Gozzoli

PANTING PAINTING
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
MULTIPLE CHARACTERS
VOICE PROCESSING
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)

18 JAN 2008 :
Black and White
at The White House


Thumbnail still from my morphing animation of all the Presidents of the United States of America

MORPHING MORPHINE
FACIAL ANIMATION
FANTAMORPH 1st GO
HISTORICAL HEADS

08 JAN 2008 :
((He(e) Be(e))
G.B. P.M.
Gordon Brown
Performs/
Transforms
"London Town"


Thumbnail still of former British Prime Minister Gordon Brown singing a Karaoke Version of Hubert Gregg's classic song "London Town" whilst on the London Lazy Och Eye the New Noo

SURPRISING SINGING
AUDIO EDITING
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)

01 DEC 2007 :
The $ub-Rhym€ ("Mark" It !)

Thumbnail still from my competition entry comic poem about the sub-prime market financial crisis

COMPETITION ENTRY
BRIEF FOR A BRIEF
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
CUTOUT ANIMATION
FACIAL ANIMATION
ICLONE SPECIAL EFFECTS
ORIGINAL TOPICAL POEM
SUBTITLED
TITLING (BLUFFTITLER)
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

17 SEP 2007 :
Unguessed
Ghost Guest


Thumbnail still of a funerary cupid that speaks the words of Branwell Bronte's character Alexander Percy as he describes an angelic vision to his mother

STEREO MONOLOGUE
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING

12 JUN 2007 :
These Boots
Were Made
With CloneCloth


Thumbnail still from a film illustrating my attempts to create a pair of virtual Wellington Boots using Reallusion software's first CloneCloth release

CLOTHES DESIGN
CUSTOM CONTENT
SOFTWARE DEMO

17 MAR 2007 :
SAINTS ALIVE !
((Congregation
(Bowl)ed (Over)
Fisher of Men's
St.Patrick's
Day/Birthday
BOLD
FISHERMAN
Boogie


Thumbnail still of a virtual Patrick Bronte singing and dancing The Bold Fisherman in St.Michaels - that's the Church not the Department Store - although I've not checked the label for libel - or a Bible

iCLONE MUSIC VIDEO
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
3D FULL BODY ANIMATION
SONG & DANCE
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)

02 MAR 2007 :
iClone
Motion Editor -
Custom
Animation
Example


Thumbnail still from a sequence showing a custom choreography animation playing in Reallusion software's iClone Motion Editor

SOFTWARE DEMO
3D FULL BODY ANIMATION

18 OCT 2006 :
Lord Above,
Sweet
Immanuel
(or What the
Hell was THAT ?)


Thumbnail still from my original animation of some original hymnal song lyrics I wrote

COMPETITION ENTRY
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
CUTOUT ANIMATION
FACIAL ANIMATION
2D FULL BODY ANIMATION
ICLONE SPECIAL EFFECTS
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SONG & DANCE
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PHOTODRAW)
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

12 AUG 2006 :
Psocker
SychoAnalysis
- The Jung
Juans'
Fraudian "Slip"
on the Skip


Thumbnail still of a virtual Jimmy Greaves playing Carl Jung with Father Christmas as Sigmund Freud in my original song with comic rhyming lyrics about soccer and psychoanalysis

JUST FOR FUN
ONLY MY FAVOURITE
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
3D FULL BODY ANIMATION
ICLONE MUSIC VIDEO
SONG & DANCE
SUBTITLED
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

07 JUN 2006 :
The
Ratcatcher's
Daughter


Thumbnail still of Mr. Kitten Caboodle the virtual cat verminator star of the iClone animated song and dance Victorian parliament tree tease The Ratcatcher's Daughter

VICTORIAN VERMINATOR
ANIMAL ANIMATION
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
3D FULL BODY ANIMATION
iCLONE MUSIC VIDEO
SONG AND DANCE
VOICE ACTING

23 APR 2006 :
Toil in Soil

Thumbnail still of a Singing Gnome frrom an animated greeting created with Reallusion's Crazy Talk Software. His delivery is of original rhyming lyrics.

GARDEN GUARDIAN
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SUBTITLED
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

18 FEB 2006 :
Animal Rites

Thumbnail still of a virtual Ancient Greek girl relating a monologue about vegetarianism, barbecues and the Eleusian Mysteries religious cult

CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
ORIGINAL POEM
SUBTITLED
VOICE ACTING

21 JAN 2006 :
Tuned-Up
TURNIP
Turned Up

Thumbnail portrait of a virtual scarecrow in a field of rape. He looks like Vincent Van Gogh amomg his sunflowers but that is not who he is. He is singing original rhyming lyrics to a well-known tune and dancing with a custom choreography create by hand in Reallusion iClone Motion Editor

CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
3D FULL BODY ANIMATION
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SONG & DANCE
SUBTITLED
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

05 NOV 2005 :
EWE Who
"Yoo Hoo !"
a Good
(Hidin') Heidi


Thumbnail portrait of a little lamb who is a who who is a singing sheep singing original rhymng lyrics in a greeting set to a familiar tune

ANIMAL ANIMATION
CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SUBTITLED
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

13 JUN 2005 :
Knowledge
of Porridge


Thumbnail still of the little old woman and a bear taken from my Flash MX animated re-working of poet laureate Robert Southey's story of The Three Bears. It predates Goldilocks. The film features HIS version of the plot re-worked by me with brand new original rhyming lyrics to a musical theatre tune.

CUTOUT ANIMATION
FLASH MX ANIMATION
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SUBTITLED
TITLING (SWiSHMAX)
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

24 AUG 2004 :
Quem Pastores

Thumbnail portrait of a woman who may be Elizabeth Branwell the sister-in-law of Patrick Bronte. Here she is singing my original rhyming hymn lyrics set to the "tune" of the German carol Quem Pastores

CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING

12 JUL 2004 :
Mundane
Mo(u)rning
with the
Dhoop Dope


Thumbnail still from my original rhyming comic anti-poetry poem about hating school - Mundane Mo(u)rning with the Dope Dhoop

CUTOUT ANIMATION
FLASH MX ANIMATION
ORIGINAL POEM
VOICE ACTING

12 JAN 2004 :
Aisle Evil -
((Pep-) Talk
Like a Pirate)


Thumbnail portrait of the piratical gruff old man singer of Aisle Evil - ((Pep))Talk Like a Pirate. The song is set to a familiar instrumental and features original rhyming lyrics

CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING

05 JAN 2004 :
Bitter Man's
Vitamins


Thumbnail sitll of Ross the Sloth the virtual animated speaker of my original rhyming poem about health and fitness. The rhyme is called "Bitter Man's Vitamins"

CRAZY TALK LIP SYNC
FACIAL ANIMATION
ORIGINAL POEM
SUBTITLED
TITLING (PREMIERE PRO)
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

10 DEC 2003 :
Day Of(f) Wra(i)th - Mozart with the Mo(i)st (')art

Thumbnail still from Day of(f) Wra(i)th - Mozart with the Mo(i)st ('art) - It is a Flash MX animated version of the Dies Irae from the Requiem Mass. All the Latin lyrics have been replaced with English soundalikes. I was ABLE to hear them and relay the result.

CUTOUT ANIMATION
FLASH MX ANIMATION
MISHEARD LYRICS
SUBTITLED
TITLING (SWiSHMAX)

06 NOV 2003 :
Flash(in') in
the Pan-Indian Sub(in)continent


Thumbnail still from my Flash MX animation of a cheeky comic song about physical flexbility. It features original rhyming lyrics set to a well-known tune

CUTOUT ANIMATION
FLASH MX ANIMATION
ORIGINAL LYRICS
SUBTITLED
TITLING (SWiSHMAX)
VOICE PROCESSING

04 MAY 1999:
Prayer the Brontës' Father
Taught Us'


Thumbnail still of a JOINT parody of the Lord's Prayer and a sewing sampler made by Anne Bronte when t'lass worrr proporrrr titchy

GRAPHICS EDITING
ICLONE ANIMATION
ORIGINAL PARODY
VOICE ACTING
VOICE PROCESSING

 

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